The Goods. The best spot to find fish in a hole or run. When a guide says, “Put the fly over there — that’s where the goods are,” do it!
Low-holing. The practice of a guide who has to be in front and won’t let anyone pass him or her on the river, pulling the anchor when another boat approaches so as to get to the next spot first. The guide can do better than those in the other boats this way, unless the guide has “no talent in the boat” (see below). Low holer = a**holer.
Dirty boy. A guide who fishes with beads.
Hit ’em. What a guide yells at a client to set the hook when the indicator is dragged three feet under the surface of the water.
Set. See Hit ’em. The best set is when the guide does not have to yell “Set.”
Sling it. To cast a fly, indicator, or whatever is on the end of the line. (Alternatively, to B.S. — “He can really sling it.”)
Huck it. Seems to mean “Cast the line.” Taken from snowboarding, where it means to jump off a steep place and “catch much air.”
Frog water. Very slow-moving water. Usually not holding fish. Guides wish to row as fast as possible through frog water, even though it makes them work really hard.
Hoover. To “Hoover” a hole means to fish it thoroughly, to clean it out like a vacuum cleaner, to the consternation of those in drift boats following. A term of respect. (I think.)
A pig. A very large fish.
A toad. Also a very large fish.
A hog. A very, very large fish.
A donkey. Also a very, very large fish.
Football. A fish shaped like a football. Does not necessarily have to be huge. It’s the shape.
Slab. A very big and especially thick fish. “The client landed a real slab today.”
Smokin’ hot. This means a lot of things. It could refer to a very attractive member of the opposite sex. (Or the same sex.) It also refers to a client who is catching a lot of fish, or to a fishing location.
Fishy. The ultimate compliment to be paid to a guide or angler. Someone who just seems to attract fish and who has the knack for catching fish.
(No) Talent in the boat. An indication of the level of skill of the client(s). “I had no talent in the boat today, and we got skunked.”
Skunked. Blanked. No fish for the day. Bad news for all concerned.
Guidable. Teachable. A client who listens to the guide, or at least appears to.
Chuck. To cast your line. (See Huck.) “Chuck it over by the seam.”
Seam. Somewhat hard to define. Where there is a difference in currents, normally marked by a line of bubbles. Or a change in depth of the water can cause a “seam.” An obvious area of change.
Schooled. To be absolutely handcuffed and made to look foolish by a creature with a single-digit IQ. “That fish really schooled you.” Used more by a guide to a client than by the client.
Mend. A word used by guides that is seemingly impossible to be heard by a client. An action that is poorly understood by most clients anyway. It means to reposition the line on the water to get a drag-free drift.
Stick. Another verb to describe the act of hooking a fish.
Back row. An unpleasant duty required frequently of a guide. It means to row the boat upstream against the current to allow another drift through the same water. Literally, it requires the use of the guide’s back, and the effort is not often appreciated by a client.
Bucket. A deep spot in a hole or run where fish like to hold. The guide would like the client always to get the fly into the bucket of any particular hole. The bucket may not be visible to the client, but the guide has to reassure the client that it really exists.
Insane. A fantastic fishing situation. To catch a lot of fish in difficult circumstances. Or just used to describe a lot of hookups. “I had an insane day on the Trinity last week.”
Downer. A discouraging event, or a fish that has spawned and is headed downstream.
Chromer. A bright fish. Usually a steelhead fresh from the ocean.
Take the time to save time. Always used by the guide as a polite way to say to the client, “Slow the f*** down” when casting, or while doing anything around the boat, for that matter.
Slow and smooth is fast. See Take the time to save time.
I guess you didn’t want that fish. A phrase used by guides to describe a client who lets a fish take the fly, but does not react to it. Often used when a client fails to see an indicator disappear under the surface of the water. Uttered by many guides.
A good guide. One who does not use the preceding phrase.
A good client. Someone who pays promptly, adds at least a 20 percent tip, and brings the guide new clients.
Peemers. Pale Morning Duns — PMDs.
Schwak. As used in fly fishing, a verb. To “schwak” something is to hit it too hard. “You schwaked that fish and broke it off.” The word has many meanings now. When I was in college, it meant to be inebriated. (“I really got schwaked last night.”) Now it even has lewd meanings that will not be mentioned here.
Gorilla. Someone who yanks rod and line too forcefully when setting the hook and schwaks the fish.
Nook. To nook the river is to fish every nook and cranny of it. (Not to be confused with “nuking it,” which is another story altogether.)
It’s money. Used to describe a perfect set of circumstances for fishing. The water flow is right, the weather is right, the fish are eating, and so on. When a guide says this, he really means, “You better not screw it up, because it won’t get any better than this.”
Epic. Used a lot by guides. Maybe somewhat overused, in fact. It means that something good is happening on the river on a big scale. “That was an epic hatch.” “That was an epic day of fishing” — lots of fish were caught, and they were big fish.
Chow. A verb, in the fly-fishing sense. It means the fish are eating both the naturals and your flies.
FUBAR. F***ed up beyond all recognition, an acronym dating back to World War II. Used by a guide to describe what happens to the rig when a client refuses to follow the guide’s directions. This can occur at any time, even within the first moments after leaving the put-in when the client denies having touched his rig.
Foam is home. Self-explanatory. Look for fish under the foam line.
Spot it, get it. If you can see the fish, you have a good shot at it.
Clyde. A former client who has become a guide. Not always a good thing.
UFL. Unnecessary fly loss. Usually uttered by a guide in exasperation when a client loses a lot of flies in many ways.
Well done. This means the same thing anywhere in the world.
Good on ya. Heard in New Zealand. Nice to hear.
